The Trees Were Mistaken

jebiwonkenobi:

#some days Stiles thinks he made a mistake #he thinks it might have been easier to have given in and let himself be bitten #but then other days he watches Derek and is reminded of just how glad he is that he said no #Derek has strength and power and reflexes that would make him the king of any sports team #but there is pain and desperation beneath that commanding exterior of his #and thats from someone who was born into this life#Stiles doesn’t think he’d adjust well #and he’d rather stand by Derek’s side as he is #to remind Derek that he’s human just as much as he is wolf

wordswithwerewolves:

Full MTV Summary:

With startling revelations weighing on him, Scott finds himself scrambling to protect the people he loves — including Allison, who begins to follow clues left by her Aunt Kate about her family history. Meanwhile, Stiles begins to close in on the mystery behind Derek’s family.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

People Scott ‘loves’. “Including” Allison.

Oh this summary writer must be new. Scott has exactly two loves: whining about lacrosse and saying Allison’s name.

So the episode starts out with the Lacrosse team celebrating a victory.

Fucks Given By Me: 0

You wanna know why?

Because, yeah, that’s right, Stiles skipped the game because HE HAS FUCKING PRIORITIES and decided that tracking down a homicidal Alpha werewolf was more important than high school sports.

So Scott wanders around shouting Stiles’ name, even though it should’ve been pretty fucking obvious that Stiles didn’t show up to the game.

Instead he runs into Allison.

AND IMMEDIATELY FORGETS THE FACT THAT HIS BFF DIDN’T SHOW UP TO THE FIRST GAME HE WAS GOING TO BE ABLE TO PLAY IN.

NO SERIOUSLY.

ALLISON SHOWS UP AND SCOTT IS ALL “STILES WHO?”

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wordswithwerewolves:

Full MTV Summary:

Clues, including a prior encounter with Derek, bring Jackson to a dangerous revelation about Scott. His actions begin to threaten not only Scott’s life but his own, while Allison starts to question the strange behavior in her own family.

So we start the episode with Asshole Chemistry Teacher.

He’s getting ready to leave when he finds this handy note on his desk with a bunch of Harris’ listed and with X’s next to their names.

I’m going to go ahead and assume that that last one without an X is him.

Haha, and on the off chance that somebody DIDN’T pick up on the fact that this dude is the last guy on the list, we helpfully get a shot of his nameplate on his desk.

And then, of course, The Alpha is there in the room.

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wordswithwerewolves:

MTV Episode Summary:

With Derek on the run from Stilinski and his sheriff’s department, Stiles must help Scott face his second full moon as a werewolf. Meanwhile, Jackson takes advantage of complications in Scott and Allison’s relationship.

The short episode summary on the video:

Still reeling from his break-up with Allison, Scott is forced to face his next full moon without the help of Derek.

Blarg.

We begin our episode with Scott denying that he and Allison are broken up and saying they’re on a break. And Stiles decides that whatever they want to call it, it’s his job to bring Scott out into the woods to get drunk.

So, I can’t believe I’m doing this but I’m going to start off this review by yelling at my bb Stiles.

What can I say. I’m an equal opportunity shouter.

*ahem*

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wordswithwerewolves:

HEY KIDS, DID YA MISS ME?

Full MTV Summary:

Trapped in the high school at night, Scott and his friends face both suspicions among each other and the threat of attack from a powerful werewolf trying to get in.

So the first time I watched this I spent the entire episode yelling loudly at the screen so brace yourselves for a quite a bit of capslocking.

Also I apologize in advance for the screencaps for this episode. It’s a really dark episode. I mean that in a literal way, not a figurative way. Figuratively it’s about par for the course darkness-wise.

Okay, so previously on Teen Wolf, Derek figured out that not is as it seems with The Vet and somehow got it in his head that this meant that The Vet is actually The Alpha. And apparently getting fucking tortured by Kate in the ruins of his family home with a giant taser was the last fucking straw for Derek and he’s pretty much desperate at this point so when Scott is all “Lol, don’t hurt The Vet I have a plan to find the Alpha,” instead of being “When you say you have a plan, you really mean that Stiles has a plan, right? RIGHT?” Derek is like “Okay sure.”

*insert facepalm gifs here*

So it turns out that Scott’s plan is basically to go to the high school at night and howl into the PA system and hope that the Alpha shows up.

No really.

NO.

REALLY.

THAT’S IT.

THAT’S THE PLAN.

HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE ANY IDEAS ABOUT WHAT TO DO WHEN THE FUCKING ALPHA DOES ACTUALLY SHOW UP.

So Scott howls into the PA, the motherfucking Alpha DOES show up and proceeds to fucking GUT Derek and toss him aside like so much trash.

I sob incoherently for a while because DEREK HALE FEELINGS, then I grab myself a beer and gear up for a 45 minute clusterfuck of idiocy.

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wordswithwerewolves:

Full MTV Summary:

Scott and Stiles come up with ways for him to control the transformation in order to be with Allison. Derek continues trying to make an ally of Scott in both his battle with the hunters and in his goal to find a mysterious figure that both sides are tracking.

Aka Stiles comes up with a plan, Scott doesn’t listen and Derek’s life continues to suck.

Ahhh, another day in the life of Teen Wolf.

So we open on Scott, hands full of grocery bags, looking for his mom’s car in a parking garage.

Scott of course is that idiot who doesn’t remember which level he parked on so he wanders around lost for a while.

Something starts chasing him and he runs desperately down through the levels until he hides behind a car.

Because you know, I’m sure a werewolf wouldn’t be able to figure out your super secret hiding place with their super werewolf senses.

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wordswithwerewolves:

Full MTV summary:

A new animal attack involving Lydia and Jackson raises more questions among authorities about wild animals. While Scott and Allison skip school and take off unannounced, Derek must deal with the ever more aggressive werewolf hunters on his own.

Even the summary is making me face-palm.

Anyways.

So we start off with a schlubby dude in a video rental place (those things still exist?) who is on a ladder changing a flickering light bulb.

Because I have watched way too much Supernatural I instantly shout “Angry spirit! Demons! AN ANGEL! DON’T SAY ‘YES’ TO THE VOICES! ANGELS ARE ALL DICKS!”

And then I remember which show I’m watching and sigh, because this dude is obviously werewolf chow.

Jackson and Lydia drive up because they apparently haven’t discovered Netflix yet.

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wordswithwerewolves:

Full MTV episode summary:

A new hunter in town puts Derek’s life in danger, forcing him to make reluctant allies out of Scott and Stiles. While Scott tries to survive dinner with Allison and her father, Stiles attempts to keep a mortally wounded Derek alive.

Happy that they realize that Derek almost dying is kind of Thing Number One in this episode, although also kind of amused that they equate Scott going to dinner with the Argents with Stiles trying to keep Derek alive.

I was actually pretty impressed by the beginning of this episode. That could be the whiskey talking though.

In any case, we start with your stereotypical attractive blonde woman driving down a darkened road in a giant SUV.

She engages in your usual horror film monster-bait activities. Checks her lip gloss, changes the radio channel from news to pop music, flips her hair about, completely ignores the red glowing eyes of the monster running outside her car window.

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wordswithwerewolves:

Okay, so first off, MTV’s official episode description for this is: 

Scott’s first date with Allison ends up in the confusion of the dreaded “group date” with Lydia and Jackson in tow; meanwhile, a mysterious animal attack has Stiles’s father, Sheriff Stilinski, on the lookout.

Is it just me, or do the mysterious animal attacks seem slightly more important that “the dreaded group date”.

Also, the quick pop-up description on the actual video is this:

Scott turns to Derek for help when he fears he can’t control the urge to kill.

Again. This seems like it should be a higher priority than dating.

Maybe it’s just me though.

Okay, so we open on Scott and Allison, frolicking through a darkened parking lot hand in hand, at which point Scott leads Allison into an empty school bus so they can make out.

Because nothing says romance like a school bus.

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wordswithwerewolves:

Okay, so first off, on one of the reblogs of the last episode I saw someone saying that lacrosse is apparently big in Canada. Who knew? Well…Canadians probably knew. But I mean, now I’m curious. So the sport has a pretty fucking interesting history according to wikipedia, but honestly I’ve never encountered a high school in the United States where the sport was big. I’ve seen US high schools where football, baseball, or even basketball were big, but never one where lacrosse was the main sport people cared about.

Then again I don’t really give a shit about sports in general, so if they had chosen football I would probably be capslocking about how little I care about football.

In any case, has anyone else encountered a high school in the US where lacrosse was big? Is that a thing that happens? Let me know.

Anyways, on to the episode.

We start off in the locker room. Naturally.

Scott is shirtless.

Stiles is not because he is apparently the only person in this fucking town who is not allergic to shirts.

He is possibly a nevernude.

Hey, you never know about these things.

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